Tuesday, May 10, 2011

comfortable with being responsible.

i wrote this on may 10, thought i'd post it. i updated it as well.

a few months ago i was saying that i was very nervous about owning things, anything, from a lap top to a car to a house; owning anything made me anxious because of the responsability required to maintain the things we own in this life.

it's all really silly to me now because we don't 'own' anything this side of heaven; everything is on loan to us from our talents to our houses to our clothing. it is on loan to us.

i am currently typing on a new laptop that i now own; that requires anti viral protection and updates, etc. ( i know nothing about computers!!! matt's good for that kind of thing;))

my fiance, matt, and i currently put an offer on a house and it was accepted. that is a big responsability.

we are car hunting; cars are in need always.

we will be exchanging our marriage vows on june 12, just a few weeks away now, and that in itself propells us in to an entire new realm of responsability. we will be responsible to pray for each other, to love eachother unconditionally, to be a source of grace towards each other.


so, we are nearly two months in to this whole new realm i was nervous about. it is wonderful. it is never ending, full of constant maintenance. i love that i do not have to do this life on my own, that God's design is togetherness, not just in marriage but in the Kingdom. i love His heart towards us, how he brings us in to a family and makes seeking Him real, tangible, a blessing to all. He is not impossible to please, far off, summoning us to do impossible things. no, He is very near, very near, indeed. and He helps us.

thank the Lord.