crazy changes.

hey. just an update. my sister just got engaged.

i am experiencing lots of emotions.

like, childhood is officially over. life is changing more rapidly the older we get. my sister is just one of the most beautiful creatures ever created. really. i am convinced of it. she is beautiful. and God is now her Lord and has provided her with an amazing man who will lead her in this life. i have been deeply blessed by her relationship with joel. it's everything she always did deserve and now God is just lavishing grace upon grace to them both for living in radical obedience.

wedding planning will be fun:) my sister is brilliant at being arty and creative so i know it will be a beautiful wedding.

she will always be my little sister. and i am so happy for her.

:)

i feel super blessed today because God is just proving to me personally His faithfulness and care towards me. it's really deep, not that it hasnt been. this is just a new season with the School of Worship and Living Light. really, there are deep things changing. like my insecurities are just falling off and being replaced by security in Him. fears are breaking off and being replaced with total TRUST in His care.

just one little way i felt God's love really impact me was yesterday evening. you see, i always stay late at school to practice piano for about two hours. i had purchased a metronome at the beginning of the year because i had began private lessons and was just pumped about having a metronome of my own and being trained classically and such. well, on thursday i went to practice and my metronome was missing. i was really bummed out about it because i had been so dedicated for the last 8 weeks. i was really upset and discouraged because it was an investment i had made into what i believe God's called me to, music, and then for my metronome to just dissapear was bizarre.

so, i daydreamed i was seeing it everywhere. like trying to rack my brain and remember the last place i had it. it either fell out of my bag or someone took it out. so, anyway. i was stressing about money because i got a lovely yellow service engine soon light in my car and sure enough it was a problem that couldn't go without being dealt with. so, i was freaking out about money and all the things i am involved in thinking things seemed overwhelming and impossible. i cried out to God. there's alot on my plate right now and i AM being stretched, so this crying out to Him was so good because it shows me where i am running to when things go crazy now, whereas before i ran to other sources of comfort.

God is so GOOD!

anyway, i borrowed a metronome to practice monday and my car was in the shop on tuesday all day...praise God it wasn't longer than that! and i went to pack my things up after practicing with the borrow metronome, my dad was waiting for me in the church parking lot, so i was throwing my things in my bag quickly but noticed something in a shiny little box. it was a brand new metronome. no note attached or anything. there it was, just for me.

i felt so loved. and all the finances lined up for my car so that's just amazing.

God will prove Himself just so that my heart will change and see Him as a fully trustworthy Daddy who has all things in mind, and has my best in mind and wants to show me His goodness in ways that i can really tangibly know. wow.

i feel really blessed.

got to lead worship this morning. that was anointed. really. God just spoke clearly about requiring a bended knee, a broken and contrite heart in us as He teaches us about Himself. and then we had a crummy practice. ha! it was funny to me because there is so much learning, so many hits and misses in this school of worship. God's patience with us and grace for us is just being lavished on. its amazing.

i love this season.

there are hard things, sure, but it is all worth it for the sake of knowing my Jesus in a more intimate way.

-b