excitement.

i am excited! 


my hubby and i worked out our final song today for the show on monday. and started coming up with our extended set list for the grand opening of the community center which is next saturday. we get an even longer set for that!


i recently received a prophetic word about my life being made for more than just the arts; to God, i am much more than an artist and that is not the only sphere i am supposed to function in. in light of this very specific word, i feel a weight as matt and i finally begin to pursue music knowing it is not supposed to be the only thing going in my life. i used to always think that it would be, and i know we are good enough to go after it. but God's will is ultimately what we are both after so i am truly seeking to have a balanced and rendered heart as i learn how to dream in God about my life and future with my husband on this earth. 


you see, dreaming is an odd thing for me lately. being married, i don't know exactly what shifts take place in a woman's heart, but i know that there has been a lot of shifting in my heart and i don't want to step out of line or be so narrow minded in my dreams and vision for how i want my life to play out. there is nothing that i want to cling tightly to, nothing at all, not even music. i always clung to my dreams of music so tightly and it was folly. whenever anyone clings to anything that is not God himself, it is folly. our hearts aren't made for those lesser lovers. my heart isn't made for those lesser lovers. 


so, in seeing that God is the better lover, the best actually, i have found that my heart for music is barely there, which is strange for me because in the past i have been such an all or nothing person; i have been all about specific things and in my zeal and passion i have made those around me all about it too. i'm good at that, getting people excited. but something is different; i think it's the shifts i a fore mentioned; the core of my being has moved and settled into a position that is immovable and has been placed upon something rock solid.


it's cool, actually, to recognize these shifts, even though i am clearly struggling to adequately or accurately describe them with words. that's another thing i used to be so good at; expression. now i don't really mind being unable to express myself in a moment because i am secure in God and the reasons i was confident in expressing myself before were all selfish reasons anyway. yet another shift in my heart;)


so, as we step out in faith and are faithful with what is put before us with music in these coming months, we know that it is not all that there is for us in this lifetime. and that is where my excitement is coming from;) i know that any involvement in worship music is an act of service and pouring my life out and any involvement in 'performing', as it were, is a stewarding of the talents God's placed in my hands; both are stewardship actually. 


i love the definition God is bringing to my life; we do things his way and on his terms, not my way on my terms. thank the Lord! just letting you all know that my heart was NOT in this place 3 years ago when i first came to kenosha and started attending living light. seriously, God has done an overhaul in me! and i love it:) i love HIM!


are there areas in your life that you know you need to allow the Lord access but are hesitating because you know there will be an overhaul??? trust me, it's better to allow him access because he wants what is best for you anyway! HE IS TRUSTWORTHY!


love,


bethany belisa